'K so this is the first time I've written anything like this, and it's been well over 7 years since I read any "lemons", so please be gentle on the feedback if you find issues with this writing :P Anyway, this is an excerpt or scene from late in the story of my Pokemon RPG fangame. I'm aware the story itself is sparse with some background information and leaves a few questions. If you have any, feel free to ask and I'll answer to the best of my ability.
Finally, sorry if some phrases or words come across as slightly repetitive; I wanted to stress how strongly Riky and Fiona feel for each other. To me personally, erotica (and sex in general) comes across as much more appealing and beautiful (for lack of a better term :P) when the characters involved demonstrate not only lust, but gentleness, care, affection, and passion for their lover (throwing in some cuteness can also help :P). I feel that when adding these to the mix the end result is heartwarming, pleasantly arousing, and enjoyable to read. I hope my attempts at doing this here was a success cX
I hope you will enjoy reading "Fulfillment" C:
Chapter 1 (5460 words) [Reviews: 1]
Date:Jun 2 2015 Chapter:Chapter 1
Characters: honestly I love the fact that you put so much into the depth of them both before the sex scene, it added passion and feeling to the whole story. Also that was quite clever with dulling of the chest spike and easily explainable in the game cannon with Atomize (often times I see that female Lucario's are lacking the chest spike or the entire spike is retractable like a claw, it's not bad mind you but it's refreshing to see a different take on it)
aside from that this is a good story and I would love to see it expanded upon.
Thanks for the encouraging feedback c: Like I said this is the first time I've ever written a lemon so it's good to know people like it thus far, despite some of it's mistakes you pointed out ^^ I probably should've made it known who was speaking on some occasions, but I was afraid people would get tired of reading something like ", said x" or "y said" over and over, so my apologies on that ^^; I did refer to a thesaurus quite frequently when writing this, but I probably coulda done better xP I'm not really good with words haha.
I'm glad you enjoyed the characterization of the...characters :P I was a little worried people may not like all the extra details, but I just like having some background and buildup so that the characters feel a little more believable. And personally, I feel this is almost a necessity when writing a sex scene :P TBH I've only recently gotten back into Pokemon after nearly 15 years so I wasn't sure how people would respond to the dulling of Riky's chest spike :P I just know that in the anime Lucario's paw spikes can turn into claws so I decided to improvise and take some artistic liberties I guess :P Thanks again for the feedback. If and when I write some more I'll definitely take your feedback ton consideration, thanks c:
(sorry if this response is kind of long; still getting used to the place :P)