PART ONE
Warning! The following story will test you sanity to it's very limits, the sheer stupidity of it very well may make dramamine nescessary (dramamine is for nausea, btw.) Not much by way of sex in here, in fact, NOT a single bloody goddamn scene of it in the whole thing. Why? Because the whole damn thing is a joke! A frickin' stupid, retarded, moronic joke, based on the stupidest premise I've ever heard of (and I'm including Poketrekking, I'm sorry, but it's true!)! So sit back and bathe in the sheer idiocy, and don't say I didn't warn ya! (Important note: The Doctor, Kupek, Sara J Smith and PRYGN-78 all have british accents [just like the actual Dr. Who])
Dr. Who
The Savage Pokemon
Part One
By Delita-san
[email protected]
--------
THE CAST
--------
THE DOCTOR
Delita Agito
KUPEK
Kupo Mog
SARA J SMITH
SaraJ
PRYGN-78
Porygon
---------
PART ONE
---------
THE DOCTOR: Well, that was quite an exciting adventure back there, I thought the Cybermen had gotten us for certain! It's a shame about Adrick, but thankfully, we've already replaced him. Right, Kupek?
KUPEK: That's right, Doctor. Hey wait a sec...
SARA J SMITH: So, Doctor, where are we headed this time?
THE DOCTOR: I thought we might visit earth sometime in the 19th century, you known, breathe in that heady Victorian atmosphere.
PRYGN-78: Sir, are you sure we can get there?
THE DOCTOR: I admit, the Tardus is a bit tempermental, but I think it's working just fine now.
*The Doctor presses a button on the Tardus' control panel. The Tardus is transported through time.*
THE DOCTOR: Ah, here we are.
*The Doctor pulls the lever with the big red knob on it and opens the door. The Tardus has arrived in the middle of a city, with motorcycles and cars driving by.*
SARA J SMITH: Working just fine, is it?
THE DOCTOR: Oh dear, I fear I've gone and cocked it up big time.
*An officer of the law approaches the Tardus*
OFFICER JENNY: Hey, where did this phone booth come from?
THE DOCTOR: It's worse than I thought; Americans. Hello madam.
OFFICER JENNY: Hi. Who are you, and where did this phone booth come from?
THE DOCTOR: I am The Doctor, and this is the Tardus. We're from.... out of town.
KUPEK: Ten thousand years out of town...
THE DOCTOR: Quiet, Kupek!
OFFICER JENNY: Well I'm afraid you'll have to move it.
THE DOCTOR: So terribly sorry, it'll just be a few moments.
*The Doctor runs into the Tardus for a moment. He runs back out.*
THE DOCTOR: Sorry, the flight circuits are damaged, I'll need a few hours to repair them.
OFFICER JENNY: Flight circuits?
THE DOCTOR: Oh dammit all! I knew I shouldn't have said that! I shouldn't be telling you this but you know too much already, so what harm will this do? I am a Time Lord, from ten thousand years in your future.
OFFICER JENNY: I see.
*Officer Jenny grabs her radio*
OFFICER JENNY: I'm gonna need backup, I think we have an escaped mental patient here.
THE DOCTOR: I can assure, I am quite sane. By the way, would you like a jelly baby?
*The Doctor pulls a bag of gummi bears from his pocket*
OFFICER JENNY: No thanks.
*The Doctor puts the bag back in his pocket.*
THE DOCTOR: Could we perhaps talk about this?
OFFICER JENNY: Sorry, pal, but I think talking time is over.
*A dozen police cars appear*
THE DOCTOR: Oh dear. This can't be good.
OFFICER JENNY: You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law....
*Officer Jenny places handcuffs on The Doctor*
THE DOCTOR: Kupek, Sara! Get back to the Tardus!
KUPEK: Will do, doc!
*Kupek and Sara J Smith run to the Tardus, but are cut off by several police officers who handcuff them and read them their rights.*
THE DOCTOR: This is going to get a lot worse before it gets better...
KUPEK: NO kidding!
*The Doctor, Kupek and Sara J Smith are all shoved in the back of a police car. The car drives off.*
THE DOCTOR: Kupek, I need you to reach into my pocket and remove the laser cutting tool.
KUPEK: Why can't Sara do it? She's right there!
THE DOCTOR: Sorry, I've had unfortunate misunderstanding with women when I ask them to reach into my pocket.
SARA J SMITH: Hey! That's very rude!
THE DOCTOR: It's also deathly true.
KUPEK: Fine.
*Kupek reachs across and sticks his hand in The Doctor's coat pocket. He grabs a laser cutting device from it.*
THE DOCTOR: Good, now hand it to Sara.
*Kupek hands the tool to Sara J Smith*
THE DOCTOR: Now, cut through these cuffs.
COP1: Man, these guys are nuts, that looks like a dentist's mirror to me.
COP2: Total agreement here.
*Sara J Smith cuts The Doctor's handcuffs and hands him the laser cutting device. The Doctor then cuts Sara J Smith and Kupek's handcuffs.*
COP1: What the hell?!
THE DOCTOR: Alright everyone, out the doors. And remember, tuck and roll!
*Everyone dives out the car's right hand door. The roll to the side of the road.*
KUPEK: ow!! I think I twisted my ankle!
*The Doctor picks up Kupek*'
THE DOCTOR: Quick, Sara, let's go! In there looks good!
*The Doctor, carrying Kupek, and Sara J Smith run to a hotel.*
DESK CLERK: Can I help you?
THE DOCTOR: We need a room.
DESK CLERK: That'll be $45 a night.
THE DOCTOR: Sara, you're from this time period. Pay the man.
SARA J SMITH: ME?! Why do I have to pay?
THE DOCTOR: Because Time Lords don't have wallets, or money!
SARA J SMITH: Dammit! Fine!
*Sara J Smith pays the Desk Clerk.*
DESK CLERK: Thank you, here's your key. Have a pleasant stay.
*The Doctor carries Kupek to the room, with Sara J Smith following. When they walk in, they find a large heart shaped bed.*
THE DOCTOR: Most peculiar.
SARA J SMITH: Brilliant. Did you look at the hotel sign?
THE DOCTOR: No, why?
*The Doctor looks out the window at the sign. "HOTEL INFERNO: IGNITE YOUR DESIRES"*
THE DOCTOR: Oh my...
*END PART ONE*
---------------
Writer's Explanation: I suppose I should explain myself, this is pretty fucked up. I have been watching a lot of Dr. Who lately, and it's finally seeped into my stories. I had to write this, just to get it our of my system, and now I pass it on you, the readers! And yes, there will be more to this. An episode of Dr. Who averages about four parts, and that's who long this will be. One last note on the names/casting: Kupek is a spoof of Adrick (mentioned above), who was a character on the show when Peter Davison played The Doctor. Sara J Smith is a spoof of Sarah Jane Smith. I picked SaraJ for obvious reasons. PRYGN-78 is a joke on K9. And finally, The Doctor portrayed here is base on Tom Baker's rendition (he was the DEFINITIVE Doctor), and his famous line "Would you like a jelly baby?" was used for that reason. Sorry to inflict this upon you, but I must!
Dr. Who
The Savage Pokemon
Part One
By Delita-san
[email protected]
--------
THE CAST
--------
THE DOCTOR
Delita Agito
KUPEK
Kupo Mog
SARA J SMITH
SaraJ
PRYGN-78
Porygon
---------
PART ONE
---------
THE DOCTOR: Well, that was quite an exciting adventure back there, I thought the Cybermen had gotten us for certain! It's a shame about Adrick, but thankfully, we've already replaced him. Right, Kupek?
KUPEK: That's right, Doctor. Hey wait a sec...
SARA J SMITH: So, Doctor, where are we headed this time?
THE DOCTOR: I thought we might visit earth sometime in the 19th century, you known, breathe in that heady Victorian atmosphere.
PRYGN-78: Sir, are you sure we can get there?
THE DOCTOR: I admit, the Tardus is a bit tempermental, but I think it's working just fine now.
*The Doctor presses a button on the Tardus' control panel. The Tardus is transported through time.*
THE DOCTOR: Ah, here we are.
*The Doctor pulls the lever with the big red knob on it and opens the door. The Tardus has arrived in the middle of a city, with motorcycles and cars driving by.*
SARA J SMITH: Working just fine, is it?
THE DOCTOR: Oh dear, I fear I've gone and cocked it up big time.
*An officer of the law approaches the Tardus*
OFFICER JENNY: Hey, where did this phone booth come from?
THE DOCTOR: It's worse than I thought; Americans. Hello madam.
OFFICER JENNY: Hi. Who are you, and where did this phone booth come from?
THE DOCTOR: I am The Doctor, and this is the Tardus. We're from.... out of town.
KUPEK: Ten thousand years out of town...
THE DOCTOR: Quiet, Kupek!
OFFICER JENNY: Well I'm afraid you'll have to move it.
THE DOCTOR: So terribly sorry, it'll just be a few moments.
*The Doctor runs into the Tardus for a moment. He runs back out.*
THE DOCTOR: Sorry, the flight circuits are damaged, I'll need a few hours to repair them.
OFFICER JENNY: Flight circuits?
THE DOCTOR: Oh dammit all! I knew I shouldn't have said that! I shouldn't be telling you this but you know too much already, so what harm will this do? I am a Time Lord, from ten thousand years in your future.
OFFICER JENNY: I see.
*Officer Jenny grabs her radio*
OFFICER JENNY: I'm gonna need backup, I think we have an escaped mental patient here.
THE DOCTOR: I can assure, I am quite sane. By the way, would you like a jelly baby?
*The Doctor pulls a bag of gummi bears from his pocket*
OFFICER JENNY: No thanks.
*The Doctor puts the bag back in his pocket.*
THE DOCTOR: Could we perhaps talk about this?
OFFICER JENNY: Sorry, pal, but I think talking time is over.
*A dozen police cars appear*
THE DOCTOR: Oh dear. This can't be good.
OFFICER JENNY: You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law....
*Officer Jenny places handcuffs on The Doctor*
THE DOCTOR: Kupek, Sara! Get back to the Tardus!
KUPEK: Will do, doc!
*Kupek and Sara J Smith run to the Tardus, but are cut off by several police officers who handcuff them and read them their rights.*
THE DOCTOR: This is going to get a lot worse before it gets better...
KUPEK: NO kidding!
*The Doctor, Kupek and Sara J Smith are all shoved in the back of a police car. The car drives off.*
THE DOCTOR: Kupek, I need you to reach into my pocket and remove the laser cutting tool.
KUPEK: Why can't Sara do it? She's right there!
THE DOCTOR: Sorry, I've had unfortunate misunderstanding with women when I ask them to reach into my pocket.
SARA J SMITH: Hey! That's very rude!
THE DOCTOR: It's also deathly true.
KUPEK: Fine.
*Kupek reachs across and sticks his hand in The Doctor's coat pocket. He grabs a laser cutting device from it.*
THE DOCTOR: Good, now hand it to Sara.
*Kupek hands the tool to Sara J Smith*
THE DOCTOR: Now, cut through these cuffs.
COP1: Man, these guys are nuts, that looks like a dentist's mirror to me.
COP2: Total agreement here.
*Sara J Smith cuts The Doctor's handcuffs and hands him the laser cutting device. The Doctor then cuts Sara J Smith and Kupek's handcuffs.*
COP1: What the hell?!
THE DOCTOR: Alright everyone, out the doors. And remember, tuck and roll!
*Everyone dives out the car's right hand door. The roll to the side of the road.*
KUPEK: ow!! I think I twisted my ankle!
*The Doctor picks up Kupek*'
THE DOCTOR: Quick, Sara, let's go! In there looks good!
*The Doctor, carrying Kupek, and Sara J Smith run to a hotel.*
DESK CLERK: Can I help you?
THE DOCTOR: We need a room.
DESK CLERK: That'll be $45 a night.
THE DOCTOR: Sara, you're from this time period. Pay the man.
SARA J SMITH: ME?! Why do I have to pay?
THE DOCTOR: Because Time Lords don't have wallets, or money!
SARA J SMITH: Dammit! Fine!
*Sara J Smith pays the Desk Clerk.*
DESK CLERK: Thank you, here's your key. Have a pleasant stay.
*The Doctor carries Kupek to the room, with Sara J Smith following. When they walk in, they find a large heart shaped bed.*
THE DOCTOR: Most peculiar.
SARA J SMITH: Brilliant. Did you look at the hotel sign?
THE DOCTOR: No, why?
*The Doctor looks out the window at the sign. "HOTEL INFERNO: IGNITE YOUR DESIRES"*
THE DOCTOR: Oh my...
*END PART ONE*
---------------
Writer's Explanation: I suppose I should explain myself, this is pretty fucked up. I have been watching a lot of Dr. Who lately, and it's finally seeped into my stories. I had to write this, just to get it our of my system, and now I pass it on you, the readers! And yes, there will be more to this. An episode of Dr. Who averages about four parts, and that's who long this will be. One last note on the names/casting: Kupek is a spoof of Adrick (mentioned above), who was a character on the show when Peter Davison played The Doctor. Sara J Smith is a spoof of Sarah Jane Smith. I picked SaraJ for obvious reasons. PRYGN-78 is a joke on K9. And finally, The Doctor portrayed here is base on Tom Baker's rendition (he was the DEFINITIVE Doctor), and his famous line "Would you like a jelly baby?" was used for that reason. Sorry to inflict this upon you, but I must!