The Weirdest Teenager Alive
CHANSON DU SOLITARE
IX.
"We've arrived," the officer said upon their arrival in Viridian.
"I see," Listol remarked.
"Keep frosty," Takeru said.
Crystal and the others attempted to go inside with Takeru and Listol, but the guards blocked them.
"Authorized personnel only," the guard said. "Sorry."
The Harberians were led to a massive room, with at least a hundred men there in suits, not counting the guards.
"Um...who's the Prime Minister again?" Listol asked.
"Don't worry," Takeru whispered. "This is the U.N., and the news reports I've seen imply they run on empty threats. Keep cool, act like you didn't know."
"Now," a man said, "explain your presence on our world, alien."
"I came here..." Takeru began.
"Silence, boy! Let the adults speak."
Listol was outraged. "How dare you speak to the King like thatâ�"!"
"Silence, Listol!" Takeru yelled.
"So," the human remarked, "the boy is the king. Very well...continue, boy."
"I fled here to escape Nyonian forces. Normally, they don't pick up on where you go. But somehow, they tracked me here."
"So you are a refugee?"
"No, I actually intended to leave much earlier. But, I met a Rukario."
"And what does that change?"
"In Harberia, people have married Rukarios, as well as each other, until cosmetic surgery was invented. Now, Harberians are usually blinded with lust. This, I have failed to be. She was smitten by I, and the romance resounded..." Takeru began, drifting into thoughts about Crystal.
"Hey," Listol interrupted, "keep focused."
"Sorry," Takeru said. "But anyway, I now have a fiancée and a son. How could I leave them, or take them to Harberia, where war rages madly?"
"True," the man said. "And it wouldn't be good if humanity were to be regarded as hostile in the galactic community. We will vote on your future on this world."
"Thank you," Takeru said.
They departed the room, confident in humanity yet again.
Meanwhile...
Viktor and Dreamstalker walked up to Santiago.
"We were spotted," Viktor said.
"What?!" Santiago yelled.
"Takeru spotted us, and opened fire. We weren't hit, but they know we're on the planet. Luckily, though, the humans arrested them. We could easily escape and make them believe we're still here."
"Impossible," Santiago replied, "as the S.S. Katana orbits Earth."
At the UN...
"Well," the leader said to the Harberians, "we have decided that we will allow you to remain."
"Thank you," Takeru replied.
A few minutes later, they returned to the group.
"We may stay," Takeru said.
"Oh, thank God," Crystal said, kissing him. Then, realizing that she hadn't had sex with him in forever, and partially because she was (again) entering heat, she feigned a plan.
"Gah!" she groaned.
"Crystal, are you OK?" Taker asked.
"The rocks aren't working anymore for my back," she said.
"Need a doctor?" Takeru asked.
"No," she replied, "but maybe a night in a decent room would help."
Listol saw right through the plot, and decided to help her.
"Here," he said, "you should go to the Sampson Inn. I hear the beds are great."
"Yeah," Crystal said, realizing what his attempts were. "But I'm scared of going to a room alone...Yoshi, how about staying with me?"
"Well, I guess..."
"Hey," Listol said, "how about we take Corey off your hands? Surely if you're caring for Crystal, and you sure will be, he'll be a bit much to handle?"
"Are you sure?" Takeru asked. "He's a bit attached to us, and may not like staying without us."
"Nonsense," Listol said, taking the Riolu into his arms, "he loves his Uncle Listol, see?"
(By then, Takeru and Max were the only ones not realizing what was happening.)
"Well," Takeru said, "I guess my back could use some rest...Listol, are you sure you're cut for domestic work like this?"
"It's one night of babysitting a Riolu!" How hard could it be?"
"He's the Prince of Harberia, and your future King."
"Oh...well, still, I think if I can storm a bunker, kill ten soldiers, hijack a machine gun, and kill a hundred more, then blow up the entire base, all in a hour or two, total body count 500, then I can baby-sit for the night...and I'm not alone here."
"True," Takeru said, "I guess you're right. OK, we can go for a night."
"OK. Let's go reserve the room," Crystal said. As they left, she mouthed out 'thank you' to Listol and the group.
"Oh, wait!" Takeru said, turning back to face Listol. "What was that, about 'you sure will be'?"
"Um, well..." Listol said. "She has a back injury, and I'm sure you'll be helping to heal her, no?"
"I guess," Takeru said, and they left.
There, Crystal began attempting to seduce him, but to no avail at first, as if the relationship had been totally platonic up until then. So, she ran to the nearest adult store, and bought a few bottles of exotic massage oils, which made him more receptive. She then ran back to the store to buy some lingerie, which really got him going. Then, after regular intercourse, they were in a different reality. Crystal, realizing he was now ready, decided to try something she'd seen advertised at the store. She slowly took off his pants, and Takeru was in utter blissâ�"until he looked down, and saw Crystal sucking on him like a baby on a pacifier, and he drew away.
"What..." Crystal asked. "Was I biting? Was I doing something wrong?" she asked, slightly crying.
"I know what you're up to, and honestly, I thought your self-esteem was higher."
"What did I do?"
"That...thing you were doing. It's degrading to you. What would make youâ�"anyone want to do that? It just...degrades you!"
"Was I doing it wrong? Because..."
"No. You weren't...I actually did like it, I'll admit, but I don't want to take advantage of you like that?"
"But I want to. What's the worst that could happen?"
"Well, first it's this. It gets bad, trust me."
"Well, I'm not stupid," Crystal said. "I just wanted to make you happy. But..."
Takeru thought a minute. She had a pointâ�"his way of viewing it was too sexually conservative.
"Fine," he said, making her eyes light up, "but still, just remember, you don't have to do that sort of thing to make me love you."
She nodded, as in a 'yeah, whatever' sort of way, and knelt down. She had read the pamphlet in the store, and she knew what she was doing. A few minutes later, his semen shot into her mouth, and she savored the flavor. Takeru, however, was disgusted by this, but didn't show it.
"Thanks," she said, crawling into bed with him. "Besides, it's one time, anyway. Although, there's no guarantee it's the last time, though."
"You just wait, Crystal," Takeru smirked. "I may have sexual function, but I'm only 14. When I hit puberty, it'll be like me going 'into heat', as you say, but it's an overdrive. Believe me."
"I can't wait," she said. She maneuvered to kiss him, but he shied away.
"What?" she asked.
"Um..."
"Oh," she said, realizing the problem.
IX.
"We've arrived," the officer said upon their arrival in Viridian.
"I see," Listol remarked.
"Keep frosty," Takeru said.
Crystal and the others attempted to go inside with Takeru and Listol, but the guards blocked them.
"Authorized personnel only," the guard said. "Sorry."
The Harberians were led to a massive room, with at least a hundred men there in suits, not counting the guards.
"Um...who's the Prime Minister again?" Listol asked.
"Don't worry," Takeru whispered. "This is the U.N., and the news reports I've seen imply they run on empty threats. Keep cool, act like you didn't know."
"Now," a man said, "explain your presence on our world, alien."
"I came here..." Takeru began.
"Silence, boy! Let the adults speak."
Listol was outraged. "How dare you speak to the King like thatâ�"!"
"Silence, Listol!" Takeru yelled.
"So," the human remarked, "the boy is the king. Very well...continue, boy."
"I fled here to escape Nyonian forces. Normally, they don't pick up on where you go. But somehow, they tracked me here."
"So you are a refugee?"
"No, I actually intended to leave much earlier. But, I met a Rukario."
"And what does that change?"
"In Harberia, people have married Rukarios, as well as each other, until cosmetic surgery was invented. Now, Harberians are usually blinded with lust. This, I have failed to be. She was smitten by I, and the romance resounded..." Takeru began, drifting into thoughts about Crystal.
"Hey," Listol interrupted, "keep focused."
"Sorry," Takeru said. "But anyway, I now have a fiancée and a son. How could I leave them, or take them to Harberia, where war rages madly?"
"True," the man said. "And it wouldn't be good if humanity were to be regarded as hostile in the galactic community. We will vote on your future on this world."
"Thank you," Takeru said.
They departed the room, confident in humanity yet again.
Meanwhile...
Viktor and Dreamstalker walked up to Santiago.
"We were spotted," Viktor said.
"What?!" Santiago yelled.
"Takeru spotted us, and opened fire. We weren't hit, but they know we're on the planet. Luckily, though, the humans arrested them. We could easily escape and make them believe we're still here."
"Impossible," Santiago replied, "as the S.S. Katana orbits Earth."
At the UN...
"Well," the leader said to the Harberians, "we have decided that we will allow you to remain."
"Thank you," Takeru replied.
A few minutes later, they returned to the group.
"We may stay," Takeru said.
"Oh, thank God," Crystal said, kissing him. Then, realizing that she hadn't had sex with him in forever, and partially because she was (again) entering heat, she feigned a plan.
"Gah!" she groaned.
"Crystal, are you OK?" Taker asked.
"The rocks aren't working anymore for my back," she said.
"Need a doctor?" Takeru asked.
"No," she replied, "but maybe a night in a decent room would help."
Listol saw right through the plot, and decided to help her.
"Here," he said, "you should go to the Sampson Inn. I hear the beds are great."
"Yeah," Crystal said, realizing what his attempts were. "But I'm scared of going to a room alone...Yoshi, how about staying with me?"
"Well, I guess..."
"Hey," Listol said, "how about we take Corey off your hands? Surely if you're caring for Crystal, and you sure will be, he'll be a bit much to handle?"
"Are you sure?" Takeru asked. "He's a bit attached to us, and may not like staying without us."
"Nonsense," Listol said, taking the Riolu into his arms, "he loves his Uncle Listol, see?"
(By then, Takeru and Max were the only ones not realizing what was happening.)
"Well," Takeru said, "I guess my back could use some rest...Listol, are you sure you're cut for domestic work like this?"
"It's one night of babysitting a Riolu!" How hard could it be?"
"He's the Prince of Harberia, and your future King."
"Oh...well, still, I think if I can storm a bunker, kill ten soldiers, hijack a machine gun, and kill a hundred more, then blow up the entire base, all in a hour or two, total body count 500, then I can baby-sit for the night...and I'm not alone here."
"True," Takeru said, "I guess you're right. OK, we can go for a night."
"OK. Let's go reserve the room," Crystal said. As they left, she mouthed out 'thank you' to Listol and the group.
"Oh, wait!" Takeru said, turning back to face Listol. "What was that, about 'you sure will be'?"
"Um, well..." Listol said. "She has a back injury, and I'm sure you'll be helping to heal her, no?"
"I guess," Takeru said, and they left.
There, Crystal began attempting to seduce him, but to no avail at first, as if the relationship had been totally platonic up until then. So, she ran to the nearest adult store, and bought a few bottles of exotic massage oils, which made him more receptive. She then ran back to the store to buy some lingerie, which really got him going. Then, after regular intercourse, they were in a different reality. Crystal, realizing he was now ready, decided to try something she'd seen advertised at the store. She slowly took off his pants, and Takeru was in utter blissâ�"until he looked down, and saw Crystal sucking on him like a baby on a pacifier, and he drew away.
"What..." Crystal asked. "Was I biting? Was I doing something wrong?" she asked, slightly crying.
"I know what you're up to, and honestly, I thought your self-esteem was higher."
"What did I do?"
"That...thing you were doing. It's degrading to you. What would make youâ�"anyone want to do that? It just...degrades you!"
"Was I doing it wrong? Because..."
"No. You weren't...I actually did like it, I'll admit, but I don't want to take advantage of you like that?"
"But I want to. What's the worst that could happen?"
"Well, first it's this. It gets bad, trust me."
"Well, I'm not stupid," Crystal said. "I just wanted to make you happy. But..."
Takeru thought a minute. She had a pointâ�"his way of viewing it was too sexually conservative.
"Fine," he said, making her eyes light up, "but still, just remember, you don't have to do that sort of thing to make me love you."
She nodded, as in a 'yeah, whatever' sort of way, and knelt down. She had read the pamphlet in the store, and she knew what she was doing. A few minutes later, his semen shot into her mouth, and she savored the flavor. Takeru, however, was disgusted by this, but didn't show it.
"Thanks," she said, crawling into bed with him. "Besides, it's one time, anyway. Although, there's no guarantee it's the last time, though."
"You just wait, Crystal," Takeru smirked. "I may have sexual function, but I'm only 14. When I hit puberty, it'll be like me going 'into heat', as you say, but it's an overdrive. Believe me."
"I can't wait," she said. She maneuvered to kiss him, but he shied away.
"What?" she asked.
"Um..."
"Oh," she said, realizing the problem.