I woke up the next day, sprawled flat across the grass. I groaned to myself, trying to remember how I neglected to remember to return to my home to sleep. A few spearow had perched themselves on my legs and were taking turns pecking at them. It didn't really bother me that they were doing this. After all, I let a mew kiss me for 10 seconds... it's only fair that other pokemon had their chance to exploit my body.

I paused on my own terminology. Exploited. Was that how I really felt about everything? I didn't know how else to feel about my situation right now. Everything that had happened to me recently seemed to have no bearing on who I was or what I had done in the past. I felt completely disconnected from the world that I was beginning to see so vividly with my "eye for truth". For the first time in my life, it hurt to be known as Yeshua.

"Mew!", a voice cried out emotionally. Before I could even react to the voice, I saw mew streak right through the group of spearow, sending them tumbling into the air. The mew looked at me, concerned. I looked back at her, unsure about what I should say. Mew took the silence as there being a problem and flew off somewhere.

I didn't move for a while, just lying there. Mew suddenly returned with a giant payapa berry. She looked at me with concern in her eyes. I looked back at her before speaking. "I... I'm fine", I lied.

"Mew!", the mew insisted, and dropped the payapa berry on top of me. Unfortunately for me, mew did not take into consideration the proper place to drop a payapa berry on a male. I watched helplessly as the payapa berry was dropped right over my crotch.

My reaction to the berry landing on my crotch was instantaneous. I turned over to my side, dropping the payapa berry to the earth. "Ugggh", I strained through my teeth to cry out the pain I was feeling. My hand instinctively moved to my crotch, doing whatever I could to try to ease the pain.

In the meantime, the door to the garden had opened suddenly. Mew took notice of this and was quick to turn invisible before being noticed. Nick walked into the lab and looked around for a bit. He didn't see mew, which didn't really surprise him. Nick knew he scared the crap out of that mew. For some strange reason, most of the women he had met before seemed to react the same way.
They would be freaked out by Nick, and they would "turn invisible".

Nick looked over in the direction of the open clearing and quirked his eyebrow. He saw Yeshua with a strained look on his face and his hand gently rubbing his crotch. Nick rolled his eyes and walked to the clearing before speaking. "That's pretty damn bold, Yeshua... pretty damn bold."

I looked up at Nick, surprised to see him. Working through the pain, I managed to speak up at last. "Huh?"

Nick grinned. "Masturbating in the lab's garden... I didn't think you had it in you!"

I looked up at him in disbelief, then I looked down and saw that I had been trying to soothe the pain in such a way that the outside observer would find questionable. I quickly tried to explain what was going on. "That...that isn't what I was doing!"

Nick shook his head at me. "Dude... I caught you red-handed."

I became nervous. He didn't believe me. What was he going to do? Nick seemed to see how afraid I looked, and he looked a bit calmer.

"Relax", he stated. "I'm not one to disclose that kind of information to anybody. Besides, this is the first normal thing I've ever seen you do since you've worked here."

I mentally slapped myself. This was going to be my reputation to him for the remainder of my work here.

"Were you thinking of some girl?", he inquired.

I nodded. Yeah... the girl that dropped the payapa berry on my crotch...

"Aww...", he teased. "Isn't that romantic?"

I simultaneously rolled my eyes and shook my head. Nick seemed to move over to the side, captivated by something. "And what might this be?"

I looked at him as he walked over to a spot nearby. He bent over and picked it up. Then, he started to speak again. "Well... if it isn't a payapa berry for your girlfriend! And look... it's shaped just like a heart!"

I started to get slightly annoyed at this point. Wasn't he taking the teasing just a little bit too far? Then he turned around to face me, and I gasped. The payapa berry looked exactly like a heart! The payapa berry that the mew picked for me looked exactly like a heart! What...what did this mean? Was it just a strange coincidence?

Nick tossed me the payapa berry and I caught it. I put the berry in my backpack. He started to speak again. "You were late today, so I decided to start ahead of you with the research. So this was where you were hiding!"

I panicked in realization. I was supposed to have reported my data to the professor first thing this morning! I was going to lose my job! I quickly gathered my things and started to run towards the door.

"Yeshua?", Nick called out. "Hey, Yeshua!? Where are you going!?"

I ran out the door with my notes in tow, unable to think enough to address Nick's question. Nick was left behind with a baffled look on his face. Then, he shook his head. "Damn kid's hormones are out of control!"

***

I arrived at the professor's door with a feeling of imminent doom. I knocked on the door. "Enter", was the reply. I slowly walked into the room and shut the door behind me. The professor was sitting down at his desk reading the book that had been worn from his thumbprints. He looked up at me, his expression unreadable.

I decided to break the silence. "I fell asleep in the garden... I'm so sorry!"

He looked at me with a bored look on his face. "Do you have any notes?"

I was taken aback for a second, but quickly regained my composure. "Yes, professor." I reached into my backpack and took out my notepad that I had been filling up with notes. I put it on the professor's desk. He grabbed the notes and began to pour through them. He looked up and realized that I was still there. He spoke. "You can get out, now."

I sighed in relief. I had passed the assignment given by the professor. I wondered what he wanted me to do next. "Where should I go now, professor?"

The professor looked at me again. "Perhaps I didn't make myself clear... when I said that you could get out, I meant that you could get out of the building."

I choked on my next few breaths. He couldn't be saying what I thought he was saying. "You... you can't mean...?"

"You're fired, Yeshua", he clarified. "Does my message seem less cryptic now?"

I stood there... shocked. "No", I thought to myself. It was over... everything was over. My friendship with Nick... and any further contact with that mew. I didn't know what to do... I didn't know what to say. Everything I hadn't done was something that I should have been able to do, and everything I had done was something I shouldn't have been able to do. I had no words for what was happening... and I had no actions to respond with, either. I was broken and didn't know who I was supposed to turn to for repair.

The professor just stared at me uncaringly. "By all means, just stand there like a pitiful statue. Just stand there and admit to me how this was 'the only chance you could make something of yourself'. Flop around like a magikarp and proclaim your clichéd existence to me!"

I couldn't move... I couldn't retaliate. I was Yeshua... and I couldn't escape truth no matter what I did or did not do. I never could have imagined a more pitiful interrogation. I was being dissected right in front of the professor.

"You really are pathetic, Yeshua... much more pathetic than anyone else I've ever met in my entire life! Humanity has bestowed upon you a unique gift, and the net result is that you have lowered the value of humanity's existence with your pitiful display of ordinary!"

I didn't move... and I didn't think I could ever move again. I was locked in my mind, unable to escape. My existence felt completely eclipsed by the professor's. No one would ever be able to witness my light...not even myself. A mirror would only show my shadow; None of my light could ever be reflected. I envisioned the story of my life being held in the professor's hands. I envisioned his thumbprints etched into my skin. I wanted him to take that book and just close it. I wanted the story to end... here and now.

I looked at the professor. He looked at his watch. He took the page he was reading and bent the corner. I knew then that he would be back. As soon as that book shut, I would be his. He could return to my existence and conjure it whenever he wanted. I had no strength left in me to stop him. I stood there as he was getting ready to close his book.

"Mew!", a voice in my head started to speak. I heard the mew's cry in my head. I began to remember the events of last night. I remembered how cute the mew had looked as I was taking notes about it. I remembered the way the mew kissed me. I remembered how strange it all felt... and I remembered the mew trying to protect me from those harmless spearow. Our existences had resonated in a way that I had never known before.

I remembered the payapa fruit that she gave me: the heart-shaped testament to whatever bond that we shared at that very moment. These thoughts raced in my mind. Even though I had no idea of what this bond fully meant, I knew that it was worth protecting. The professor was getting ready to leave the room... getting ready to shut the book on my life... and the door for this conversation. I reacted.

"NO!" I yelled, surprising the professor and causing him to drop the book back on the desk, still remaining on the pages that he had been reading. He looked up at me, startled. He quickly regained his composure before responding. "No? No what?"

"I won't let myself repeat your story!", I yelled.

The professor looked at me with a confused look on his face. I reached into my backpack and pulled out the payapa berry that mew had given me.

"This berry... this is the berry that the mew had given to me this morning!" I shouted. "This is the only thing I will have to remember this day by... the only thing that I will have to remember the mew by!"

The professor looked at me in shock. "That's not..."

"Payapa's lament!", I interrupted. The second bookshelf had slid open and once again had revealed the vial of pokerus and the strange pokeball. The professor turned his attention to me again, waiting for an explanation.

"Those are the words that unlock your past... that unlock your hurt. I don't know why these are your words, but if I leave mew under these conditions, then those will be the same words that unlock me. If I leave, then I'll just be lamenting over this payapa. I will have been the one who had abandoned a pokemon I formed a bond with. What happened to you would be happening to the mew."

The professor grew livid. "You can't even compare those two instances!!"

I looked back at the professor. "I just did! Go ahead and fire me now, but you'd be firing someone who is more of a man than you are!"

I thought he would explode from that comment, but instead, he calmed down. He looked back over my notes. "You didn't mention that mew gave you that payapa fruit anywhere in these notes."

I was surprised. Nothing seemed to faze the professor for very long. I answered him. "I didn't think that something like that would interest you."

"You didn't think that the way that a mew interacted with humans would interest me?", he asked quizzically.

He had a point. Maybe I should have been more thorough with my notes...

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. "Enter", the professor replied. I saw Nick come into the room, oblivious to whatever conversation was going on between the professor and myself. Nick looked at me and smiled before speaking.

"Hey, Yeshua! You ran off in such a hurry to the professor's office. After a while, I started to wonder what happened to you. Glad to see you're doing okay!"

Nick looked at me, then at the professor, and then back and me again. "So... what are you guys talking about?"

I looked at the professor before speaking. "The professor and I were going over my notes about mew. He took such an interest in them that we went over them with great detail."

I looked over at the professor, who was looking at me strangely. I continued. "In fact, he was just suggesting a new assignment for me to work on, isn't that right, professor?"

The professor muttered something that sounded like "mmm", and I knew that I had won this round.

Nick turned to me. "That's great!", he said. "Now come on! It's lunch time, and I know this great place! It's called woopers, and the girls there have the biggest..."

"Nikolai", the professor interrupted. Nick turned to see the professor staring disapprovingly at him.

"Whoops!", Nick responded. "Let's continue this conversation outside, Yeshua."

I agreed quickly, waving at the professor and leaving with Nick. I shut the door, leaving the professor behind.

The professor opened up the desk drawer and pulled out a bottle of wine. He popped the cork and neglected the glass right next to him. He took a large drink from the bottle before setting it back down on the table. "Bastards", he said, with words directed at no one.Chapter End Notes:Rate and review: apply directly to the story.

Next chapter: Conflicts between Yeshua and the professor escalate to new heights. Violent heights. Mew and Yeshua spend time together.

Next chapter: Repen