AGNPH Stories

The Human Species by RingsOfSaturn


Story Notes:

It was a quiet night when Deoxys descended from the heavens.
Believed to not be of this world, it went on a rampage, leaving death and destruction in its wake.
Finally defeated by an unknown force, the tragedy of unparalleled magnitude it created remains in the heart of every human.
To make sure that something like this will never happen again, every wild Pokèmon powerful enough to cause such mayhem must be captured, controlled or killed.
Needless to say, this year has been a bad year for Legendaries. This year has also been a bad year for Champion Trainers.
But my year... Has been... THE WORST! 

Author's Chapter Notes:


Young Prodigy Lucas

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"To cause so much damage to Rayquaza..." Lucas whispered to himself while examining the burns of his Pokèmon's back, "... Surely it couldn't have been that Pikachu!" His right hand thumbed the trusty Pokedex in his right pocket, but stopped when he realized he already knew exactly what it was going to say.

Pikachu, the Mouse Pokèmon, and the evolved form of Pichu. Pikachu's tail is sometimes struck by lightning as it raises it to check its surroundings.

The familiar voice of the computer fills his head together with many questions. Checking the Pokèmon in front of him he realized that the only one capable of such an electric attack would be the Pikachu.

His thoughts were interrupted as a loud rumbling sounded above him. Looking up, he saw that the sky had been blotted out by several dark clouds that he was sure had not been there before.

The term 'struck by lightning' echoed through his head, the ominous clouds and his trainer's intuition forcing him into action.

"This looks bad..." Lucas whispered to himself as he decided to proceed with caution, "... Rayquaza! Use your Air Lock!" Rayquaza reared back and gave off a mighty roar, positioned between its trainer and the shaking quintet.

"Damn it, I always forget the earplugs!" Lucario shouted angrily as his eyesight returned.

Razyquaza roared loudly once more before sailing directly upward into the sky, leaving several confused Pokèmon behind it. It moved at unbelievable speed for such a large body, reaching the clouds above it in a matter of seconds.

"What's it doing...?" the Gallade asked as it disappeared among the dark clouds.

"... Charging up now would be a bad idea, I think" Pikablu mumbled to himself, seeing only a faint figure of the massive snake among the clouds, "Everyone, get ready for the worst!"

Everyone braced themselves for whatever attack might pop out of the ominous gathering of clouds above them. Some were expecting a massive hyper beam, others fearing that a giant tidal wave would appear out of nowhere.

None of them were expecting that the clouds would suddenly start to fade away, Rayquaza becoming more apparent among them as it sat calmly in the sky.

"What the..." Pikablu whispered to himself with an unfamiliar sensation creeping up his back. Something he once would have defined as 'Fear'.

"Whew! I thought lightning was going to rain down, or something!" Zerobi said, sighing in relief.

"... Crap!" Pikablu shouted as Rayquaza showed no signs of leaving its spot up in the sky, "This is bad! I used up all my electricity, and I can't recharge if there's no lightning!"

"Y-You can't use thunder!?" the Gallade stammered with surprise, "That's bad! Like, really, REALLY bad!"

"Oh..." Zerobi mumbled to herself while remembering teachings relating to electric-types, "... Oh! You were the one summoning the clouds?"

"Quick!" Pikablu yelled while turning himself towards Lucario and Zerobi, "You two, can you do something to knock Rayquaza out of the sky!?"

"Hmm... Don't think I can jump that far" Lucario said slowly while pondering and scratching his chin, "... Or hit that hard. So no, probably not."

"Well, guess what!" Pikablu continued with rage, "Until Rayquaza cuts that out I won't be able to use 50%, I won't be able to use any electric attacks, I won't even be able to recharge a damn battery! Find a way to fix it, or fight this moron by yourself!"

"Hmpf..." Lucario huffed with a sinister smile while smacking his fists together, "That's all? Sounds perfect to me!"

"Yeah, cool it down a bit" Zerobi said and scratched her left ear, "Dunno what that trainer's got down his pants, but as long as it's not another Rayquaza we'll be able to kick their butts by ourselves."

"Hey! I'm in on it, too!" Kabuta jumped in with a confident voice, "Hell, we're all in on it! I didn't come all the way here to not fight, anyway!"

Lucas saw the odd gathering of Pokèmon conversing with one another, most likely figuring out a strategy for defeating him. Pokèmon strategizing and cooperating were rare, but not unheard of. He wasn't sure exactly what he had done to garnish such hatred from them, enough to have them attack something as large as Rayquaza just to get to him.

Knowing that Rayquaza was out of commission, Lucas removed a Pokeball from his belt. His trusted Tremor would have the type advantage against two of them, and probably be more than enough for the rest as well. Even so, he thought it would be a good chance for him to train some of his weaker Pokèmon, as well as the extremely rare specimen he just recently caught...

"... Fine. I'm putting my trust in you guys" Pikablu said begrudgingly, rapidly trying to come up with a battle plan beyond the usual 'lightning them until they fall'. It wasn't going good, since he had so little experience in the subject.

"... Is everyone ready?" he finally said, at a loss for words.

"I was born ready!" Kabuta shouted confidently, striking a battle pose with outstretched scythes.

"You were born kicking and screaming" the Gallade snickered while getting himself in position as well.

"You wouldn't know!" Kabuta snapped back, an image of a Gallade passed out on a bed flashing through her mind.

"... I'll take that as a yes" Pikablu groaned before turning his head towards the Lucario and Weavile, "You two... Are you ready, too?"

"I personally became ready during adolescence" Lucario responded with a chirp, "... Maybe a bit later... Doesn't matter now, I guess..."

"Hearing these guys talk, I'm as ready as I'll ever be" Zerobi sighed while carefully slapping her forehead, "Although for the record, I'd prefer not dying and winning instead!"

"Alright" Pikablu grumbled and gritted his teeth while crossing his arms in a very manly way, "Let's beat 'em up."

As if on cue, Lucas threw a Pokeball into the air, followed by two others. A thick red light escaped the balls as they opened, three strange creatures forming in their wake. A blue Pokèmon on two legs with two large fins sticking out of its arms was the first one to appear, directly in front of Lucas. The red color of the Pokeball never quite left its inhabitant, a humanoid creature that looked like a cross between a lobster and a dragonfly with both pincers and wings appearing to the left of the trainer.

The quintet's eyes mostly ignored these two and instantly hit his right, where the red light had grown to incredible proportions. As it disappeared, it left a truly gigantic Pokèmon behind it. It was almost as large as Rayquaza, and its body was much like the finned creature's in shape, but much bulkier than either. Spikes protruded from its back and tail, and the body had a weak green color covering most of it.

"A... A Tyranitar!?" Pikablu stuttered as his eyes shot open, "Damn it, why's everything going against me today!?"

"So THAT's how he got Celebi!" the Gallade said while putting his arms together, "It's a Dark-type so I can't sense its strength, but I think it's pretty obvious..."

"Alright, I know who I'm NOT fighting" Lucario spoke clearly before looking over at the lobster humanoid, "Dibs on the bug-thingie."

"No! The Scizor's mine!" Kabuta shouted with a barely visible smile, "I've been swatting Scyther since I was clinging on to pops' back!"

"Damn it, I want to fight something human for once!" Lucario burst out as the stress started getting to him, "You take that landshark or whatever the hell it is!"

"Nope!" Kabuta repeated, her neck suddenly extending slightly to strengthen her determination in the matter.

"And you!" Lucario kept going while pointing at Pikablu, "What, you're just not gonna fight at all!? Are you a mouse or a man!?"

"That thing's a Dark and Ground type, so that counts out Pikablu and me" the Gallade calmly pointed out while shaking his head slowly, "We won't even be able to scratch it..."

"Alright, here's the deal" Pikablu said, finished with his planning, "Kabuta, go for the Scizor. Cut him up fast. The Garchomp will be troublesome, but nothing compared to the Tyranitar..."

"Oh! I'll take that one!" the Gallade shouted happily as he sent a vicious glare to the Garchomp, "It'll be a pleasure to knock the ugly out of it!"

"... Anyway, we'll obviously have to leave the Tyranitar to Zerobi..." Pikablu continued.

"Wait, what?" Zerobi gasped, "Are you mad!? I can't fight something that big!"

"We don't have a choice!" Pikablu said with determination, "You're a Dark and Ice type, you've got a better chance of beating it than any of us!"

"I'm not cut out for that kind of enemy!" Zerobi clarified, "I'm fast and nimble! That thing's not going to budge even if I land a critical hit!"

"Just dodge him, then!" Pikablu argued, "Keep him busy until we're done with our opponents, then we'll gang up on him!"

They were interrupted as the three Pokèmon finally started moving towards them. The Scizor was flying a few feet in the air while the Tyranitar was walking with long, slow steps that seemed to shake the ground beneath them. The Garchomp was the only one walking almost like a regular human despite its odd appearance.

"Zerobi!" Lucario shouted to his shaking partner, "In case you haven't noticed, we're all in a tight spot here! It's time to man up!"

"... Fine" Zerobi finally growled after looking over the Tyranitar carefully, "I can do that... Distract him, that is."

"Still..." Pikablu mumbled hopefully, "This should be easy."

"OK, exactly WHAT part of this looks like it's going to be easy!?" Lucario yelled angrily, the opposing three Pokèmon picking up the pace.

"We'll have an advantage" Pikablu quickly explained, "Three Pokèmon, but only one trainer. He won't be able to direct more than one at a time."

"Hey, Lucario" the Gallade said while giving him a tap on the shoulder, "Team up with me. Let's lay the beatdowns on the Garchomp and defeat it quickly!"

"... Which one's the Garchomp?" Lucario asked, seeing that the Scizor was moving a bit ahead of the others.

"The ugly one" the Gallade said.

"Gonna have to be a bit more specific, there..." Lucario replied.

"Wait!" Pikablu suddenly shouted as a thought hit him, "I've got an idea!"

"Too late!" Zerobi shouted back, as their enemies were already upon them. She ran as fast as she could towards the hulking beast behind the others, while Kabuta ran next to her to get to the Scizor. Lucario headed towards the the Garchomp, and the Gallade was about to follow him when suddenly something grabbed a hold of his arm to stop him.

"Get over here!" Pikablu growled with a gruff voice while pulling back the surprised Gallade, "Quick! Use that sissy electric grab on me!"

"... The electrifying Fish Dive?" the Gallade asked, instantly forgetting his obligations to Lucario, "Oh, you mean as a substitute for the lightning?"

"Your wimpy electricity isn't enough to activate 50%!" Pikablu said with annoyance, "I'm completely empty, give me SOME electricity so I can use 25%!"

"Uh... 25% only boosts your speed, right?" the Gallade mumbled while looking at the gigantic Tyranitar and tough looking Garchomp behind him, "You sure it'll help?"

"Whatever!" Pikablu exclaimed while throwing his arms up into the air, "I'm not sitting on the sidelines like a bloody cripple!"

"... Right!" the Gallade said confidently as his elongated arms received a yellow glow, "Let me fill you up!"

"Could you wait, like, a minute or two?" Lucario asked the Garchomp while looking back at a bolt of lightning suddenly appearing behind him, "My ally must've picked a fight with a mouse... And lost."

"No" was all the Garchomp said with a wheezy voice before lying herself down on her stomach.

"... I get it!" Lucario exclaimed, "You're one of those opposite-types! That say one thing but mean ano..."

Lucario stopped himself as the Garchomp began twisting her body around, slowly sinking into the ground with strands of grass and dirt flying all around her. He gasped as only the dorsal fin of stuck out from the grasslands, about to make another witty remark as she started diving down, disappearing completely as it dug deeper underground.

"... There!" Lucario shouted to himself as he sensed the aura of his enemy rapidly approaching from underneath. He quickly jumped out of the way as the Garchomp burst through the ground, sending gravel flying in every direction.

"Prepare for a nose dive!" Lucario shouted triumphantly as he leaped towards the Garchomp who was still oblivious to the fact that she had missed. Before Lucario could reach her, something hard struck his waist.

"Brace yourself, dipshit!" Lucario heard Kabuta's brash voice yell from behind him as he turned around, seeing that the Scizor had rammed him in midair. It flew off about a meter before getting pelted by several sharp rocks. Having been thrown off course, Lucario was forced to give up on his attack as he slowly fell towards the ground, seeing the gigantic Tyranitar fire off a large black sphere in the distance.

Zerobi spun around and leaped to the side as the gigantic stomp smashed down right next to her. The turmoil and disorientation of fighting a creature so large that it made her look like an insect did little to diminish her determination.

"You clumsy oaf!" Zerobi shouted with glee, inhaling and then exhaling a freezing wind that froze the ground beneath them. Joy filled her heart as the Tyranitar began slipping on the ice, but shattered together with the ice as it brought down its massive foot once more.

"How's this!?" Zerobi yelled, again blowing a cloud of chill aimed directly at the Tyranitar this time.

"Tremor! Focus your Dark Pulse!" Lucas suddenly shouted, making Zerobi look his way. The Tyranitar reared back for a moment as the severe cold seemed to affect him, before suddenly spitting out a humongous ball of dark energy at Zerobi, who just barely managed to jump out of the way. Her heart was pounding loudly, instantly regretting having agreed to fight this monster. Her only hope was to wait until the others finished off their opponents, and she decided to take a quick peek at what was going on with them...

"Come on, buzz some more!" Kabuta shouted while she bent over another nearby rock and cut it to pieces. The Scizor gulped audioably as Kabuta sent the sharp shrapnel flying in her direction. She tried to dive underneath them, but ended up getting struck by several of them before reaching Kabuta and punching her. To her surprise, Kabuta didn't even try to avoid the attack as the punch connected with her hard shell.

"You ain't got nothin' on me!" Kabuta laughed mockingly as the Scizor settled in the air once more, "I'm a stonewall! Much harder than you'll ever be!" The Scizor had been able to ignore the Kabutops' trash talking at first, but as the insults became progressively worse she found herself involuntarily raging.

"I said: Much harder than you'll ever be! Did you just deliver a baby from your earhole, or something!?" Kabuta laughed with a horrendously vicious voice, "I'm twice the man you'll ever be!"

"You idiot!" the Scizor suddenly burst out, roaring with anguish, "I'm female, too!"

"Explains why in a million years I wouldn't wanna be with ya!" Kabuta kept laughing with a mocking tone, "I thought it was just because you were grotesquely ugly!"

"THAT'S IT!" the Scizor screamed furiously, landing on the ground and rushing towards Kabuta.

"Sarah! No!" Lucas shouted as he saw what was happening, but it was too late. The Scizor struck Kabuta directly in the face with a powerful blow, but she barely even budged.

"That hurt... Some" Kabuta admitted before throwing up her arms behind the Scizor, the scythes cutting up the wings on her back. The Scizor fell forward in shock as Kabuta leaned her head back.

"Plenty enough for me share it with you" Kabuta said before headbutting the Scizor so hard that she stumbled backwards, her brain shaking to the point where she couldn't stand on her feet anymore as everything darkened before her vision.

Meanwhile, the Gallade watched the many events unfold before him while Pikablu simply stood still with his eyes closed.

"So, about that whole 'Not sitting on the sidelines' thing..." the Gallade mentioned with a somewhat amused tone.

"... Shut up..." Pikablu growled, "I'm trying to make sense out of your stupid electricity..."

"... It's just electricity, right?" the Gallade asked, used to having his electricity get the lowest grade from Pikablu whenever it was used.

"A psychic type like you wouldn't understand..." Pikablu explained slowly, "... It's like having a stranger inside of you."

"WHOA, WHOA!" the Gallade shouted while rearing back in terror, "THAT bad!? Sorry, man! I didn't-"

"If you have time to bust my chops, how about YOU assist them for a bit?" Pikablu mumbled angrily, opening his eyes momentarily to stare down the Gallade.

"I already am!" the Gallade responded cheerfully. Meanwhile, Lucario was about to be struck in the abdomen with one of the Garcomp's fins when a transparent wall of pinkish hue appeared between them, repelling the attack.

"Just so you know!" the Gallade shouted smugly, "If she aims for the face, I'm letting it through!" He was fully expecting another one of Lucario's witty comebacks, and felt just a little disappointed as Lucario jumped back from the Garchomp while seemingly ignoring him.

"T-Time out!" Lucario stammered between heavy gasps, "I n-need to c-catch..." The Garchomp moved closer and suddenly rammed him with her shoulder, sending him flying away from the powerful blow.

"Grace! Use Fire Fang!" Lucas yelled, breaking contact with the ongoing fight between Zerobi and tremors as well as Kabuta and Sarah. Lucario knew fully well what was coming when he saw tiny sparks appear in the Garchomps mouth, gnashing her teeth together in a menacing manner.

"T-This is bad...!" Lucario stuttered before shouting at the Gallade, "Can I get some help with this reverse Lucario!?"

"Reverse... What?" the Gallade asked after running up to him, away from the preparing Pikablu.

"Yeah! I figured it all out!" Lucario explained with faint signs of insanity in his eyes, "See, it has got fins instead of spikes, and they're sticking out of his arms and back instead of hands and chest!"

"First of all, it's female" the Gallade said while the previous comment easily slipped through his mind while barely leaving a dent, "Second of all... What the hell did you just say?"

"Just an observation" Lucario said, "Here's another - We're going to have to deal with fire very soon."

"Hmm... Play with fire, and..." the Gallade mumbled as he recalled something, "... Oh wait, you're the one who told me that, right?"

"SARAH! RETURN!" a voice suddenly sounded from behind the Garchomp, a red beam striking the Scizor and returning it to the Pokeball in Lucas' hand.

"Hahahah!" Kabuta laughed triumphantly, "You fell for it! I was just pretending to be a jerk to get you to attack recklessly!"

"... And here I thought Kabutops were super rare..." Lucas whispered sadly while pulling out a new Pokeball from his belt, "Let's have a battle of the fossils!" Without hesitation he threw it into the air, making it open up and bringing yet another Pokèmon into the battle. Lucario peeked over to Kabuta to see what kind of Pokèmon it was, but had to scratch his eyes as thought he was seeing double.

"... Kabuta...?" Kabutops asked silently, surprised to all of a sudden be seeing his daughter in front of him.

"Kabutops!" both Pikablu and the Gallade shouted out loud, instantly recognizing their old friend.

"P-Pops!" Kabuta stammered in shock and relief, "Don't worry, we'll have this wrapped up in no time!"

Kabutops stood quiet for a long time, looking around him. He was a bit dazed from having spent so much time in the Pokeball, but having dealt with the massive disorientation of skipping a centure or two he was able to get a grasp of the situation quickly enough.

"... Pikablu..." Kabutops said questioningly with hidden menace in his voice, "... Why is my only daughter fighting against a trainer strong enough to possess Rayquaza and defeat Celebi...?"

"Didn't know about that! Honestly!" Pikablu explained while trying to defend himself, "She was burning with determination, wanting to avenge you and Yakushi! Who was I to turn her down!?"

"Yakushi..." Kabutops repeated as a glimmer of hope appeared in his eyes, "... Did he make it?"

"He's a bit hurt, nothing to worry about!" the Gallade laughed, "We're here to save you! Just stay put and we'll set you free!

"... Stay put...?" Kabutops mumbled to himself before brandishing his scythes, "... I don't think so..." His heart started pounding faster as he let off a deep primal growl, feeling himself become lost in a feral rampage. Shooting out a stream of water from his front, he flew backwards heading directly towards his trainer like a propelled jet.

"Y-YIKES!" Lucas stammered before quickly shooting a red line at the approaching Pokèmon, "Kabutops, return!" Kabutops was hit by the beam and turned into a red light, which continued in its path towards Lucas and went past his neck before disappearing.

"Haaah..." Lucas exhaled deeply, almost falling to his knees in shock, "I hate using untrained Pokèmon in battle..."

"Hey!" Kabuta yelled angrily while staring at the trainer, "You'll pay for what you did to p-"

"YOU THREE DONE WITH THAT YET!?" Lucario bellowed loudly and interrupted her, "Do something! He's gonna kill her!"

The trio snapped out of their daze and turned towards Lucario. He was holding back the Garchomp's large fangs with his bare hands, bending backwards from the pressure and barely being able to stand his ground. Some of the fur on the left side of his torso had been burned off. More importantly, he was looking feverishly to his right, where the Tyranitar stood tall over a wounded Zerobi. She was crouched down to her knees, blood dripping down from her forehead.

"Gah...!" Zerobi coughed. She needed a moment to wipe the blood away from her eyes, but knew that the Tyranitar would strike the instant one of her hands left the ground. She winced as the thick fluid ran past her eyes, her vision turning hazy and red which reminded her of her blood induced haze from so many years ago. Looking up at the monster's head made it so much worse, as the blood was pouring into her sockets like it was a bucket. She tried her best to see what the Pokèmon in front of her had planned, but finally looked down to get rid of the blood and was unable to notice the Tyranitar charging up yet another Dark Pulse.

A yellow flash of lightning passed her by, moving with a zig-zag motion on the ground before suddenly curving upwards. It hit the Tyranitar's jaw, forcing his mouth shut as the Dark Pulse to a stop as he reared his head back once more. Everyone stared at the peculiar scene as the bolt of lightning bounced back from the Tyranitar and landed a few paces away from the stunned Zerobi, a small shockwave of electricity appearing around it.

"I'm back, baby" Pikablu said confidently as the aura of lightning surrounding him slowly dissipated, and the hopes of victory for the quintet was regained.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Chapter End Notes:

"... And that's my plan. What do you think?"

"That... A-Are you serious!?"


"... I should have seen this coming long ago... Ever since those humans..."

"I'll take your mumbling as a 'yes'. You'll start out as a lower ranked officer of course, but keep at it and you'll make general in no time!"

"... Such arrogance! Where the hell is your confidence coming from!?"

"I spend the day defeating viscous monsters with my bare hands and sleep with many beautiful women at night. What do you think?"

"... I think this is a horrifying idea, and I am aghast that came to me about it."

"You're strong. You know that they'll be coming for you, too."

"... I am strong, but I bear no resentment towards humans. Leave."

"Listen, you can either join me or die at my hands..."


"... Is what those humans are going to tell you when they get here. If even that..."


"Me? I'm offering you a chance. One shot a glory, a triumphant fight for justice against this oppressing society!"

"... And what if I refuse?"

"Matters little, quite frankly. Even if you are too lazy to do anything for your brethren, there will never be a shortage of those that aren't."

"Hmpf. I think you will be quite surprised at how many would label this insanity as... Well, insanity."

"To a revolutionary, 'insanity' is but another badge of honor created by one's enemies!"

"... If someone like you were to take advantage of this situation, there is no telling what might happen... The entire world might..."

"The entire world WILL, my friend! This is the ultimate opportunity for change!

"In that case... If I cannot persuade your evil with words, I must stop you by force!"

"... Come on. Don't. It'll just be embarrassing."

"Before your rise to power... Before the slaughter of a thousand innocent... Before your detrimental dictatorship... I will end it all here and now!"

"End? Perhaps! It's the end... One that will be followed by yet another beginning! HAH!"


"... But not for you, it seems..."

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