It was high noon over the Hoenn region. In the Gym of Petalburg city, a battle was taking place. However, it was merely a warm-up. Even so, the Blaziken that belonged to May did not seem interested in holding back.

"Kalina, you're being too rough again! Ease up!" May screamed in an attempt to get through to her partner. Nothing seemed to calm the raging female as she pummeled Norman's Slaking with flame-powered kicks and punches. This was not unusual behavior. After returning home, May's Blaziken, who had been named Kalina, was shockingly brutal in battle and even somewhat cold at all times. May was constantly troubled by her friend's violent and unpredictable behavior.

"Slaking is unable to battle! The winner is..." The referee was cut off as Kalina sent Slaking airborne and followed up with a mean Sky Uppercut. The impact sounded like an explosion as Slaking was sent through the roof, screaming all the way until he was out of sight. Norman brought a hand to his face and groaned, "Another hole in the roof. That makes 15 this month!" The Gym Leader sighed as his eyes roamed the ceiling. Wooden boards had been nailed over various holes where Kalina had sent her opponents flying through.

"I guess that's all for today. May, see that Kalina doesn't smash up the rest of the Gym." Norman sighed, noticing the Blaziken's hateful glare, which almost seemed to say, "Pitiful little man. No male can match me. Stop setting me up with wimps." Once the Gym Leader had left the building, May groaned, "How many more times are you gonna trash the place?! You weren't always like this! What's wrong with you?!" Kalina simply replied by crossing her arms and looking up. May sighed, "I wish Ash was here. I'm sure he would know what to do."


At the Pokemon Center in Oldale town, Ash Ketchum spoke over the picture phone. "Really?! That's awesome, Mom!" Delia replied, "Thank you, dear. I'll be getting out on good behavior in three months if things keep going as they are." Ash then asked, "But why? How did you get caught up with Team Rocket?"

Delia sighed, knowing that she had no way around it. "It was my mistake to involve myself with that organization. I'd rather not go into the details, but let's just say I was young and naïve at the time. I pulled more than my fair share of mischief. But I'm done. I'm going to serve my time and get right back to being Mrs. Ketchum." Ash then laughed, "It's OK, Mom. Just as long as you don't have any connections to them anymore. Oh, and sorry about the house."

Delia asked, "The house? Did something happen?" Ash gulped, "Well, I threw a party while you were gone and invited all of my Pokemon. But they brought along a few friends. A while later, they got into a brawl and...well...let's just say that it's gonna be a while before we get the Gloom odor out." Much to Ash's surprise, his mother fell off her chair laughing! "Mom?! What happened?!" She climbed back into view and sighed, "I actually enjoy the smell of Gloom! 1 in 1,000 people enjoy the stench, and I happen to be one. Don't worry about it. Chances are that the house will have aired out by the time I get back." Ash chuckled that his mother was laid back enough to not mind a party gone wrong in her own house.

After a moment more of simple conversation, Delia finally asked, "Now that I think about it, where's Pikachu? He's usually on your shoulder whenever I see you." Ash nodded, "That's the thing. I retired. All my Pokemon are just hanging out at Professor Oak's lab. I'm just traveling now." Delia sighed, "I see. So where are you headed next?" Ash replied, "I'm in Oldale town, so I'll be heading over to Petalburg next. I'm pretty sure May and Max would like me to drop on by and visit." Delia smiled and nodded, "I'm sure they will be. May's such a nice girl. Make sure you give her my regards." Just then, a voice in the distance shouted, "Hey, Delia! The mess hall doesn't have hands of its own, ya know!" Ash muttered, "The heck...?" Delia giggled, "Oh, that's just the warden. I also prepare the meals here. That means I better get back to work! Take care, sweetie!" The screen suddenly went blank after that. "Mom...you always look after people."

Once Ash got his bearings, he set out to the west. "Been a few years since I last saw them. I'll bet Max's put on a few inches. Hmmmm....." Ash allowed his mind to wander. He could almost picture his little friend at double his original height. "And May..... She's about 14 right now...." Ash closed his mind as he allowed his mind to wander further. He could picture her wearing her red and white clothing, a few inches taller than before. But his eyes began to trail downwards and soon fixed their gaze on her breasts. In reality, Ash began to unknowingly drool as he imagined his crush in her new teenage body. They were much larger than before, straining against the fabric as if even the slightest increase in pressure would cause the shirt to rip open. But his trance was short lived as a sound was heard.

"Wha...? Is someone there?" Ash looked around in a tizzy as he heard one long yell. "Sllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!" The deep bass tone was growing steadily louder as a shadow that was covering Ash grew steadily larger. "Wait a sec... That sounds like a....." When he looked up, Ash's face went blank in shock. "Oooohhhhh CRAP!!!!" A second later, there was a thunderous crash as a Slaking fell right on top of the unfortunate boy, sending a shockwave across the area.


"There's no way a Blaziken could've sent a heavyweight like Slaking this far. It should be pretty close." Norman grumbled as he ran down the road, hoping to find some clues of where his Slaking may have landed. But he soon stopped at the sight before him. His partner could not have landed in a more obvious spot! He was lying right in the middle of the road!

"Hey, Slaking! You OK?" Norman ran over to the massive simian and went around to his face. The big guy was out cold, but still alive. "Man, out like a light. Hang tight, buddy." Norman reached into his pocket and yanked out a bottle of Super Potion. "Bottoms up." Removing the lid, he helped Slaking gulp it down, even though his head was upside down from lying on his back. After a moment, the Pokemon came to and looked around, immediately noticing his Trainer's presence.

"Must've been quite a fall, huh? Think you can stand?" Norman asked as he patted the Slaking's bloated belly. The Pokemon groaned as it performed a sit-up to get to his feet. But as soon as he left the crater made by his impact, Norman shouted, "WHAT THE HELL?! YOU KILLED SOMEONE!"

Ash stiffly sat up as he cracked his neck, having been held in place for several minutes. "Aw man... Did someone...catch the number on that cargo jet? Let them know I... have their package of lead weights." Just then someone grabbed him by the shoulders and began shaking him while shouting, "Ash, are you OK?! Speak to me!" The boy finally came out of his trance and spoke, "Yeah...YEAH! I'm fine! Huh? Wait a sec... Norman?!"

"Man, Ash, I find it hard to believe you could survive being flattened by a Slaking. I guess it helps that they have more fat than muscle." Norman laughed as he looked down at the impression Ash's body left in the crater. "It felt like a giant marshmallow fell on me." Norman laughed again, "I can imagine! I'll bet May would love to hear this!" Ash smiled, "I was really hoping to visit you guys! Anything new I should know about before I get there?" Norman nodded, "Yeah. Max is currently on his own journey as a Trainer, so you won't see him at home. But May's home. I'm sure she'd be more than happy to see you."

As the two headed back to Petalburg with Slaking in his Poke Ball, Ash asked, "It's been a few years since I last saw her. What's May like now?" Norman laughed, "Interested in my daughter, are you?" Ash blushed, "Uh, no! Not like that! I'm just..." Norman interrupted, "Don't be so nervous! I know you're a nice kid! I'd be honored to have you as a son-in-law someday." Ash stopped dead in his tracks. "You...really mean that?" The Gym Leader turned and smiled, "You bet. I also happen to know that May has quite a crush on you."

This revelation made Ash start sweating buckets. "She...likes me?" Norman walked over to Ash and placed a hand on his shoulder, "She does. I've been hearing her masturbating in the shower while saying your name. That can't be just some coincidence." Ash's face started to turn red at the thought of seeing May naked. Just then, Norman laughed, "Now don't go getting any ideas! I don't want you overdoing it. Take it slow. Words to live by." It was then that Norman remembered something. "Oh yeah. One more thing. Keep your wits about you when around May's Blaziken."

This caught Ash's attention. "Her Blaziken? Why? I've never seen anything wrong with it." Norman scowled and shook his head. "I have no way of explaining it. For the last few years, that bird's been outrageously aggressive. In fact, May's Blaziken is the one who sent Slaking soaring, which resulted in you getting squashed back there." Ash gulped, knowing just how scary a Blaziken could be. "But if you stay on your guard, you'll have nothing to worry about. C'mon! Let's pick up the pace!"

As the two Trainers approached the Gym, Ash asked, "Hey, do you hear something?" Norman stopped and listened carefully. He could barely make out the sounds of heavy impacts coming from inside the Gym. "Oh boy... Looks like she's at it again." Just then, a young boy came running out the front door with an unconscious Marshtomp in his arms while yelling, "You're crazy, girl! CRAZY!!!" As he disappeared inside the Pokemon Center, Ash gulped, "I take it that was Blaziken?" Norman groaned, "At least she didn't put another hole in the ceiling."

Ever so cautiously, Norman and Ash peeked through the doors and scanned the entire Gym. There were quite a few large cracks in the walls and floor from hard impacts. And standing at the end was May and a certain Fire type Pokemon.

"Sent another one to the ER, huh?" Norman asked as he walked in. May blushed and replied, "Sorry! I don't know how to keep her under control! She's just...huh?" Just then she noticed a familiar boy standing just behind her father. "No way..... Ash?!" He stepped out from behind her father and gave a big toothy grin. "Hi, May." The girl dropped everything and ran towards him. "I missed you! Gimme a hug!" Ash was surprised by her straightforward approach, but held out his arms to embrace her anyway. As May approached, Ash's eyes trailed downwards. He did his best to keep a straight face as he watched her breasts bounce with each step. She was not a whining little girl anymore. But just before she reached him, something slugged him across the face! The sudden blow knocked the wind out of him as he was sent flopping across the floor. When he looked up, he saw May's Blaziken with her arm outstretched, as if she had just thrown a punch.

"Kalina, what was that for?! Why are you so mean to boys?!" May screamed at the top of her lungs, making the Blaziken wince. Ash climbed to his feet with a hand to his cheek. (Thank God I didn't lose any teeth.) But then he asked, "Hey, May. What did you call Blaziken? It was Kalina, right?" May turned to face him and smiled, "Yep! It's a Hawaiian name. Isn't it pretty?" Ash glanced back over to Kalina and gulped at the glare she was giving him. "Pretty. Yeah, sure."


That evening, Ash knocked at May's bedroom door. At that instant, the door flew open with Kalina on the other side. "YARGH!!! DON'T KILL ME!!!" May then called out, "That's enough! He can come in!" With a huff, Kalina stood aside. "Phew. Thanks, May. It must be rough having such a tough girl like that." May sighed, "I don't know why she's like this. Ever since I got back from Johto, she's been going nuts in every battle she gets in. I can't explain it!"

Ash looked back at Kalina, who was just standing in front of May's bed. He remembered battling her with Sceptile three years before, but she was never this unruly. "Beats me. Maybe she's just going through some kinda phase." Ash turned to walk to a chair, but suddenly slipped on a hairspray canister! "Aw man! Nononono! WAAAHHHH!!!!!" He quickly fell forward and right into a shocked Kalina, knocking her flat onto the bed.

After a few seconds, Ash spoke without opening his eyes, "That could've been bad. Huh?" He then turned his head sideways. "Whoa. This pillow's really soft and fluffy. Are those feathers I feel?" Ash then opened his eyes and immediately saw that this 'pillow' was indeed covered in feathers, but they were a certain shade of red. Much like flames. (PLEASE don't tell me that this is.....) Ash slowly turned his face up and was face to face with Kalina, his head snuggly rested in between her breasts. "This is gonna hurt." Sure enough, the disgruntled Blaziken grabbed Ash by his face and tossed him straight up into the ceiling! His head went right through it, but he became stuck there and just dangled.

May was absolutely furious that Kalina had hurt her crush over such a simple mistake and yelled, "That's the last straw! You're going back in your...wha?" May stopped as she thought she heard a faint scream. Just then, Ash yelled, "GAH! I'M SORRY, MISS CAROLINE! I HAD NO IDEA THIS WAS THE BATHROOM! HONEST! OH MAN, NOT THE PLUNGER! HAAALLLLPPPPP!!!!!" May screamed, "MOM, DON'T HURT HIM! I'LL BE RIGHT UP!" May bolted out the door and dashed for the stairs. All the while, Kalina had a sarcastic little smirk on her face.


The next morning, May had just gotten out of the shower when she passed by the guest room. Remembering that Ash had not come out yet, she gave a few knocks, "Ash, it's almost 10. Aren't you up yet?" A voice replied, "I know. It's just...tch! I can't say it." May was a bit worried now. "Come on. You can tell me. What happened?" A moment passed before Ash spoke, "Did that Jigglypuff sneak in here last night?" This baffled May, but she replied, "Not that I know of. Why?" She heard Ash sigh, "That's what I thought." The door creaked open and in the doorway stood Ash with two black eyes and the words 'I'M A' written on his forehead while the word 'WIMP' was scribbled under his mouth. Both were in permanent black marker.

"WHAT THE...?! WHO DID THIS?!" May yelled in shock at Ash's injuries and defilation of his face. The boy growled, "Who do ya think?! It was that stupid chicken! Who else would punch me in the eyes while I'm asleep?!" May was about to try and stand up for her partner, but Ash shouted, "Hey, I know you care for her, but that bird is just a jerk! What'd I ever do to her?! You think I deserve this?!" Ash then shoved May out of the way and stormed off to the bathroom.

"Dang it..... Why won't this stuff come off? I've been scrubbing for an hour!" Ash grumbled as he rubbed away with cotton balls dipped in rubbing alcohol. "Writing insults on my face.....why the hell does she have to be such a jerk?! If it was Misty, I could handle it, but a Pokemon?!" Ash felt his face grow hot with anger. "That's it! I'm outta here!" Just then, he heard a knock at the door. "Aw heck, now what?!" A voice replied, "It's me. Could I talk to you in private?" Ash calmed down a bit and sighed, "Sure. Come in, May." His crush walked in and locked the door behind her.

"I have a favor to ask. It's about Kalina..." Ash interrupted May when she mentioned her Blaziken, "No way. I can't stand to be around her. She's a..." May spoke up, "Please, just listen! I think I know why she's like this!" Ash stood down and listened. "While I was traveling in Johto, I tried to help Kalina train for Contests instead of battles. But it didn't work. She had no interest in performing for judges. Her heart burns for fierce competition. Because she was no good at them, I used my other Pokemon in the Contests. Kalina would just stand at the sides. She was so frustrated that I never battled anyone the whole time, but I didn't want to send her back home. It's my entire fault that she became so angry all the time."

Ash asked, "So what do you want me to do about it?" May smiled, "I want you to take Kalina with you. Make sure she battles often. I'm sure she'll be much more relaxed after getting all that pent-up stress out of her system." Ash sighed, "But I'm retired. I don't train Pokemon anymore." May insisted, "PLEASE?!" Ash then gave her a suspicious stare. "Is this your dad's idea?" May blushed heavily and confessed, "Kind of. The damage Kalina inflicts on the Gym itself during battles is really taking its toll on our finances. But I want her to be happier. I know that you're the only one who can help her."

Ash sighed and walked over to May. When she looked up at him, he placed his hands on her shoulders. "May, I'll do this only for you. As much as I can't stand her, I'll take Kalina with me. Just don't expect me to come back for a while." May smiled, "Ash, you're so sweet! THANK YOU!" She then gave him a little smooch on the cheek just before she left the bathroom to get Kalina's goods. Ash brought a hand to his cheek and blushed, "Only for you, May. Only for you."


Another hour later, Ash stood at the front door of the Gym with Kalina at his side. May then caught up to them with a sack of supplies in hand. "Awww, are you two getting along already?" The two of them grunted and turned their backs on each other. "I didn't think so. Anyway, here's everything you could possibly need for your trip." May handed Ash the medical supplies. "So that's everything?" May nodded, "Yep! I know you can turn Kalina's attitude around!" Ash sighed, "I'll try, but I don't know if there's any hope for this big chicken. I think she's just plain mean to begin with."

May gulped, "Ash, there's something I need to tell you. Never call Kalina a 'chicken' when she can hear you." Ash felt cold sweat falling down his face as he slowly looked back over his shoulder. Kalina's wrists were already flaring up as she cracked her knuckles. "CRAP!!!" Ash made a sudden dash to the west as Kalina brought her heel down right where he was standing, leaving a scorch mark in the ground. "Keep running! She's pretty fast!" May yelled as the Blaziken took off after him. Ash struggled to keep running as it became harder to breathe; silently cursing his luck that he came out of retirement to train such a violent bully of a bird. "Hrrrrggghhhhh!!!!! What the hell did I do to deserve this?!"Chapter End Notes:Any suggestions for future chapters are welcomed.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended, and is applicable for all consecutive chapters that follow.